oblivious. when in trouble or when you need someone to talk to, who do you usually go to? me, my friends. they do not really need to know what’s wrong…i just need their sarcasm to remind me that everything will be ok and that life will go on just as fate wants it to. hearing them laugh, rant, insult other people actually makes me feel good. it’s not that often that we see each other but when we do meet, riot. it’s not necessary for everybody to be present…i just need the company of those i’m closest to. phone call is fine. text will do. dinner, lunch or coffee with them is the best. i don’t know what wrong with me but i feel like running to my friends right now. i don’t know…i really don’t know. i guess it’s one of those days when female hormones have control over my brain, as in flooding it with emotional chuva. i’m just too damn emotional. stressful. i haven’t had a decent meal since monday. i know it’s bad but my stomach would just reject anything that goes in it. smoke, yes please...hand me marlboro lights. heartbeat, loud and fast.

bing uwi ka na!!! iwanan mo na canada!!! dali wala akong kasamang manood ng "til there was you" yes promise! shet naalala ko pa pag wala kaming magawa at may bagong tagalog na movie si bing kasama ko nanonood hahaha wala lang trip lang. sarap kasing magkwentuhan sa loob ng sinehan tapos medyo pagtatawanan nyo yung bida. at showing na ang "anger management" kailangan mapanood. kung walang mahihigit na kasama, faki koh! nonood ako mag-isa tapos pag tumatawa ako tinatadyakan-tadyakan ko yung upuan nung nasa harap ko



at meron pa rin akong gustong... promise one of these days...

there are times in life when the person you will love for the rest of your life walks into your life. sometimes, just sometimes you hurt that person, you push them away. not meaning to, but you do.

gwapo ba? hehehe

i was posting/reading through this forum which i haven't visited for the longest time and man...naluha ako promise. i guess kasi sobrang emotional ako these past few days that even the simplest things makes me cry.



"I will keep my silence, Coz I don’t want you to hear my voice cracking

I don’t want to whisper things that ring a bell, Coz now that I’m not that well

I don’t want to hold your hand, Coz I might miss its warmth

I don’t want us to be locked in an embrace, Coz I might stay forever"



and then this one hirit "they say that the most beautiful love stories are the unfinished ones...ironic as it seems to be" kasi the guys girlfriend died. kakalungkot noh. i realize na talagang in relationships you shouldn't hold back your feelings kasi you will never know kung hanggang kelan mo sila makakasama. pinahiram lang sa tin ni god yung mga loved ones natin. and besides, it's not only death that can claim your loved one. andyan yung possibility that he might find someone else, maging iba yung gusto nyo...and then grow apart. i've also accepted the fact na kahit gano mo kaingatan yung relationship, darating at darating yung pagkakataon na mate-test kayong dalawa to the point that all you can do is hope that the love you have for your partner is enough to hold it together. kakatakot but it's true.

ok pictures galore! nde pa kasi tapos yung ginagawa kong background image na puro images talaga. pag tapos na yun na gagamitin ko dito. wala lang. para maaliw ako... and sa totoo lang meron akong gustong...

sad

mind blank. cant concentrate. not eating well. can't sleep.

i admire the serenity and calm ways of the dolphin. i was still with edsamail nung time super baliw na baliw ako sa dolphins. ianggang ngayon naman actually eh pero mas madali kasing mag-alaga ng aso so nabaling dun and yun na lang ang inalagaan. pwera na lang kung akin ang palawan siguro mag-aalaga ako ng dolphins =) i changed my template kasi nde na bagay sa kin yung pa-girl pink chuva. hayun…back to black…cold, tough, silent.



Daming gusting sabihin…but it doesn’t belong here…

ok back in manila. went to batangas where my mom's from to visit our relatives and "mag-nilay-nilay". before lahat ng okasyon umuuwi kami dun eh but since i started working, sobrang bihira na ko pumunta dun and usually punta dun ng morning then uwi na sa hapon. anyway ang cute-cute nung pamangkin ko and he's so sweet. kasi dinala ko sya sa church and pinahawak ko sya sa paa ni jesus. sabi nya "kawawa naman si jesus patay sya. akukulit ba sya? (meaning makulit) pero sasaya na rin kasi mabubuhay sya" lahat ng makasalubong namin eh kinukwentuhan nya! hayun lang...



and nga pala last thursday inulit ko yung train spotting. astig!!! they pronounce "shit" as "sheyt or shite" tapos "fuck" as "faewk". sa buong movie never nila namention "drugs" kung nde ako nagkakamali...its junk or junkie. basta astig. simple lang pero enjoy ako as in nde ako tumayo sa kinauupuan ko kahit uhaw na uhaw na ko. favorite scene nung pumasok sa toilet bowl si mark renton (ewan mcgregor) hehehe masuka-suka na ko pero naaliw pa rin ako. hayun lang...o sya init na init na ko!!! at si baby soda eh sa bahay muna kasi si manang eh nde na babalik...alang mag-aalaga sa kanya. awwwwwwww

awwww my friends are now on vacation modes. preck will be going to boracay, del to baguio with his gf's family, tupie also got an invitation from jm to go to baguio, paulo will also be in baguio, and hershey's going to vatican (nde joke lang pinapipilitan lang nya na kunwari totoo yun na ininvite sya ni pope). awa lang ako sa iba kong barkada kasi may work sila. ako bahay lang siguro. i might go to batangas pero nakakatamad magbyahe plus who will feed and give vitamins to baby sundae? hayun lang...at masarap maligo sa gabi at matulog ng walang saplot!



shetness....droollll









but im happy with my phone =)

songs i sing kapag...



ultimate break-up song - steep ( hmmn"softly, gently, i will let you down coz i don't love you in the same way now") at tsaka set you free ng side a ("we often fool ourselves and say that its love only but when it's gone we end up being lonely")

im over you song - only love by the braxton's (ganito yun "im over you somehow only love knows how i have the strength to move on")

let's try once more song - forever by martin and regine

goodbye song - dont forget me ("don't forget me, im hoping that you won't forget me there were times i blew it bad gave up the best love i ever had...")



in-love song - love moves in mysterious ways tsaka simply jessie

nakaka-inlove na kantahin sayo song - be my lady ni martin (shetness!!!)

making-love song - hot in here (hahaha)



hulaan nyo kung ano kinakanta ko ngayon...

hahaha tangina ang aga ko sa office!!! wala lang. i did watch kc's debut last night and was texting nga camille while watching. really i wasn’t not joking when I said that whenever i see kc (parang close kami noh...when i say see i meant see on tv) naaalala ko si camille. siguro nga kasi pareho silang mahilig manggaya or gumawa ng funny faces hehehe tapos kinantahan pa sya ni rico blanco. astig debut!!! gusto ko rin kantahan ako ni piolo and jericho pero phuleazzzzzzzzze lang wag ng pakantahin ng john mayer song si echo (naks close? first name basis hahaha) hayun lang...and i so love my new message board! thanks richelle at nadiscover mo sya.



ok will now commence downloading!!!

^{status = eating mandarin oranges in lite syrup straight from the can hehehe}



online just to check my mail and break from reading this book the fall of joseph estrada nde ko matagalan ang connection na to. man dial-up sucks!!! im thankful that i still have it but would love to have cable or dsl. my brother works for destiny's cable internet but we don't get free net access =( useless!!!



sus ang init! andito ko sa bahay nakatunganga as usual at pinagtataguan tatay ko. bakit? wala lang. secret ko na yun. anyway kanina superbadtrip mode = on but im sure nobody's interested so why bother making kwento? (shet i sounded stupid. nde ako nagtype nun hahaha) boink boink boink joy nde ka na natuto...well makakalimutan na naman lahat yan bukas. ^honeyme



superbadtrip mode = off naiinis pero naisip ko sinasayang ko lang emosyon ko. monday na naman bukas. medyo wirdo but im actually looking forward to work or is it the super-lamig aircon and fast internet access? download speed of 75kb/sec love you eastern telecoms!!!



ay shet me gonna watch kc's debut...she reminds me of camille...not pratts you dork...as in camille ignacio



shet ubos na kinakain ko...

I’m a frustrated/wannabe web designer/developer (pretty obvious) but before I became that, I was a frustrated developer/programmer. In college, I was pretty good at programming. Logic and math was my thing then but since my first job was as a CSR/TechSupport, I lost that talent (yea yea yeah) and interest in programming. ‘til this day I regret not pursuing the opportunity that was given to me by Microsoft Great Plains. This is how the story goes:



We, CSRs of Edsamail, really wanted to leave the company. That was June of 2001. We were not that happy with the things going around and the fact that we only got 10% increase in our salary (I actually got 20% increase coz I was mabait then hehehe but don’t tell them that na). Bryan, Max, and Ethel already left the company and Cliff was transferred to Network. Tamang career move sila. I started applying and then Bryan forwarded an email to me re an opening in their company (eLearning Software Developer for Microsoft Great Plains). So hayun ako young, full of hopes and dreams at malakas pa ang loob and confident about my skills. Sinwerte natawagan and na-interview. I guess they were pretty impressed or talagang mabola lang ako hehehe so I got a call for two more interviews and then after three weeks, job offer na. Shetness…nanlaki mata ko sa job offer. Imagine my starting salary would be 21,000! Bata pa ko nun. I was only 21 and super natuwa ako!!! I actually attended the orientation, met the other team members (pioneer pa dapat kami ng eLearning!), introduced to some employees basta the usual things that you do on your first day sa job. So bakit nga nde ako natuloy dun? Ganito naman yun, I also applied/asked to be transferred to the R&D of Edsamail. Winiwelcome naman nila ako and my transfer papers were already signed by my manager, hr, R&D manager and our CTO. So ano na nga? When the news reached our CEO, nde nya tinggap. He said that he has big plans for me in CS and since Winnie (our manager then) transferred to Microsoft, I took over some of her responsibility like administering the CRM software that we were using, handling most of the technical stuffs in our department, and basically leading the team. Disappointed ako. Sobra. They tried to make me happy naman eh and for some time, naappreciate ko rin pag-stay ko dun. I actually had the chance pa para habuling yung sa Great Plains pero natamad na ko. Hayun…kaya na-stuck ako for another year with Edsamail and CS/TechSupport before finally I’ve decided to call it quits and leave the company. Umaatikabong pigilan for almost two weeks before finally natanggap na nila that I’ve really made up my mind and moving. Our manager then also resigned kaya siguro medyo nde matanggap ng CEO naming nun. Naisip ko lang, if I stayed would he have made me the manager? Nah I doubt it. Possible, may mga nagsasabi pero uso politics dun. Hayun…life…



Pero parang blessing in disguise na rin kasi early this year, Microsoft Great Plains closed its office. Sabi kasi ng Microsoft redundant na mga positions pero yung totoo style lang nila yun. They buyout the competition and then close it down. Bad noh.

i love my miryenda =) coffee, happy peanuts, and sweet camote fries. shetness nakaka-2 kape na ko eh nde dapat ako nagcocoffee. magsusuka na naman ako later =( sobrang nakakatamad and nakakaantok. grabe nakatulog ako ng naka-upo with matching hawak sa mouse. napeperfect ko na yung pagtulog ng naka-upo pero straight body hehehe bakit ko ba nde 'to natutunan nung college?

honey,



i did say babye and of course kissed you goodnight before i left early this morning. you looked so cute!!! i tried to wake you up like every 10 minutes but i get no response just mumblings i don't understand. i know that you're so tired that's why i didn't bother waking you up.



muah!

hapiboitdey kathy!!! nde ko nakakalimutan =) unang taon na nagcelebrate tayo ng birthday na magkakilala na tayo pareho nating ni-post sa mga mailing list na kasali tayo hehehe more love, happiness, and good health

ah ang init! pero ganda ng ayos namin kanina sa baba. yow-c break under palm trees with matching rumaragasang hangin hehehe kulang na lang beer or iced tea =)



shet magti-three years na kong nagwowork ng dire-diretso. i was hired by edsamail may of 2000 a few weeks after graduation. naaalala ko pa nasa bahay lang ako back from a weeklong vacation in pagudpud ilocos and walang ginagawa. natatakot kasi baka walang mahanap na job. a friend gave me a cd installer of edsamail version 1.1 pa yun. nagtritrip and experiment sa email, send ng send ng email sa sarili and nagtitingin ng ads. then may nakita akong mga email addresses dun sa ads so pinadala ko resume ko =) actually sa eveoserve ako nagaapply nun nakalagay "any position that would suit my attainments". that was wednesday morning. same day...afternoon may tumawag sa kin winnie padilla name asking me to come over for an interview for edsamail. nde pa ko makapaniwala kasi nde naman ako nagsend sa kanila. thursday nila ako pinapunta so go naman ako. isang tricycle lang mula sa bahay yung office hahaha pag dating ko dun true nga ininterview ako =) tapos nun friday morning tinawagan ako ulit...punta daw ako ng hapon dun ulit yun pala job offer na. shet na-blur ako nun ang bilis eh and super happy na rin. so tinanggap ko and nung pinapasok ako sa loob nakng...andun pala yung ka-batch ko sa ccp na cumlaude namin si jamfol este john paul pala hehehe hayun...monday nagstart na ko =)



nung pauwi na ko biglang buhos ulan buti na lang nagpasundo ako. ta's biglang nagbrowout *&$#^!^ so lakad pababa ng building eh nasa penthouse pa naman yung office nun (pero oks lang kasi 6^th floor lang yun hahaha) and may mabait akong nakasabay name nya ryan sutingco =) sya yung unang-una kong nakakwentuhan dun yiheee bait pa sya nun eh, actually mabait naman talaga sobrang manyak lang hahaha (peace tayo!!! don't forget the pasalubong!!!)



after nun...mabait na kong nagtrabaho =) ako lagi nauuna sa office 8am ako umaalis ng bahay mga 8:05 or 8:10 nasa office nako hahaha kakaiba setup dun. mga namimiss ko



1. si manang sa baba na nagtitinda. sya nagpakilala sa kin sa tofiluk, safari, and prima

2. nakaka addict na vendo machine ng coke sa tabi ni manang. payat ako nung pumasok sa edsamail eh grabe sa isang araw nakaka-5 na coke ako hayun...

3. 10min ride papunta and pauwi

4. nde nakakaconcious pumasok kahit nakapambahay hahaha

5. unlimited supply ng mongol pencil, pilot ballpen, notebook, post-it and yung cutie na pantasa ng lapis

6. karinderya sa tapat ng building

7. si alex crisano na laging nagpapagawa ng auto nya sa tapat

8. mcdo, don hen na isang tricycle lang

9. sigawan sa loob ng room ng r&d pag naglalaro sila ng cs na kalaban nila yung webdev ng evoserve na nasa ibang room

10. and of course si ramy hahaha sya yung nakakainlove na vp namin dati



ang simple pa lang ng trip namin nun and mababait pa yung mga tao....hay...kasama pa namin nun si jv colayco na namimigay ng masarap na pop corn. sya yung exec producer ng first album ng sugar free...astig noh hayun lang...hay...

birthday ng nanay ko today =) muah muah muah



was blog hopping as usual and saw some really great blogs. nainggit tuloy ako. most of the time wala akong masabi, nde organized thoughts ko, and paiba-iba ng topic. iilan lang naman nde ko pinagsasawaan eh, kwentos about our dogs, other people's dogs, and things i do with my honey =) yiheee kilig *hugs and kisses for you honey*



ryan papatayin kita pag nagcomment ka at nde ka namin susunduin! nga pala, we can only pick you up from the airport kung saturday or sunday at kung may pasalubong nde joke lang =) ay nde seryoso ako charing! plus kailangan magdown ka na agad sa bibilihin mong sportage hehehe

uh huh halfday ako. woke up late and i couldn't drag myself up from bed so i called our office and told them that i will be late/halfday. i went with manang to the vet kasi little soda has blood forming inside her ears. wawa naman. last night kasi pagdating namin we smelled something bad. kala namin face ni soda eh sabi ni manang "oi nagdudugo tenga ni soda. ang baho" true nga. smelly. so we called the vet and pinadadala nga dun eh kasi last sunday nung na-groom sya ni-pluck yung hair sa loob ng ears which is dapat talaga ginagawa. first time nya kasi...hayun nag-bleed. pero she's ok na =) hayun lang...ay lunch...yummy...

was bloghopping and i saw this journal tetaaquino nyark sya daw si kris aquino. wala gusto ko lang patulan hahaha

ok nde ko matiis yuri. here are some pics of great danes. alaga ng isang fellow DTOer ang cool noh!!!

if you love dogs, shih tzu in particular, check this site www.fantasiashihtzu.com the owner lives in davao but during PCCI sponsored shows, binabyahe nya mga tzu's nya together with her army of yaya's and hairdresser. astig!!! i wonder what her dayjob is...



so it's tuesday. back to work. antok pa ko! i wanted to watch bagets 2 kaninang 2am kaso nakatulugan ko!!! love ko si aga...really i do hehehe

long weekend = me bored. naappreciate ko yung mas matagal na tulog na nagawa ko pero ewan feeling ko mas pagod ako. usually ako nagluluto ng lunch namin pag nasa bahay ako or pag tinatamad ako, tokyo tokyo hehehe



busy na ko...nakikipagtitigan ako sa aso hahahah nga pala, kung meron interesado, we're selling our boston terrier (male) and dachshund (female) text me or leave a message on the board if interested.

naks...wala lang akong magawa. tinulugan ako ng kasama ko eh ang tagal pa ng mga tsismis shows sa tv. yes...nakakahiya man aminin pero nag-eenjoy talaga ako minsan manood ng tsismis shows. nde ko alam kung bakit. basta ganun.



4pm na...tulog pa rin ang magaling na bata. masarap tulog nya. katabi nya yung baby namin na bagong paligo...dapat lang Php 350 binayad para maging ganyan kacute ang asong yan!!! heheheh o sya...the buzz na!!!

been riding the lrt since may of last year. and yes...i live in san juan so why the hell do i take the lrt? go figure hahaha anyway, the other day this lady was ready to give birth as in!!! her husband do not know which stop they should take to go to fabella hospital. the security directed them to dorotheo jose and take a jeep, tricycle or walk na lang. the old lady sitting beside me said something like "ba't pa kasi nag-lrt nde na lang nagtaxi" eh may pumatol "ang trapik ho noh!". sabi nya ulit "eh mukang galing pa sila sa malayo, wala bang hospital sa kanila?" at may pumatol ulit "wala ho kasing bayad halos sa fabella. nakita nyo naman yung mag-asawa mukang wala rin talaga silang pera". haaay...bakit kasi ganun, alam na nga na nde maaafford ang mag-anak ng anak eh sige pa rin! hay life



nye...i just realized that most of the people who reads my blog have not experienced riding the lrt. not mrt huh! lrt as in the one that goes to baclaran to monumento. my gulay...wag nyo ng balakin specially during rush hours.



nga pala...last night...channel surfing...we chanced upon this documentary on rpn 9. tinatalakay nya yung komyunismo, pinagmulan nito, mga sangay at kung nakakatulong ba. marami akong napickup na info but i would rather not comment. medyo sensitibo...

langya...nahihirapan ako huminga. as in. ngayon na ngayon. hirap kasi ako dumighay and pag busog ako ang tendency is nde ako makahinga. like ngayon pero eto pa rin ako blogging. wala lang. para nde ko maisip.



ang tagal ng chewing gum!!! para madighay.

mejo natatamad ako lately dito sa work. nde ko pa kasi love yung new products ko. i want my imaging softwares!!! pansin ko lang ang bilis maubos money ko. ang takaw-takaw ko kasi.



kawawa naman baby soda nde na sya masyado nasusuklayan eh nasa critical stage pa naman sya right now coz it's summer sobrang naiinitan sya. at least pag properly brushed yung hair nya, nde syado buhaghag. plus brushing will make her hair more silky. will post her latest pics here before the week ends or early next week



btw...gusto kong magswimmin, sa balong malalim hehehe

langya information overload!!! whole afternoon was spent inside the conference room for the demo of our two new products. i'm handling both products so i really need to pay attention. wala lang information overload!!!



i think the puerto gallera outing will not push through. sad noh but i don't really mind...at least i won't miss my honey too much =)

finally!!! its working!! oh well...more pics =)



first three pics: brutus he's our 5 months old boston terrier













this is peter a show type pitbull





samson, a labrador retriever. his brother, blackjack, is with my brother in frisco





this is bruno a basset hound =) our first pure breed





and mommy lisa, brutus' mom